Post by Daruka on Jan 18, 2010 18:46:36 GMT -8
The days grow thin. The air is not as pleasing. The wind has indeed grown harsh against me. Do I completely understand my situation? I never have. I just wish I knew more, why is it that I don’t? My head keeps pounding from so much pressure lately. Will no one listen? Well no one ever has. I keep to myself most of the days. I fear that my life may just end. This scar... No. This marking. This marking on my arm keeps me from being who I wish to be. It has stripped my life from me. These walls that confine me each day grow smaller and smaller. Closer and closer... This mark. What does it truly stand for? Why can I not tell? So many questions and so little time. The guard leader has grown a rather peculiar sense around me. Why is it that he always asks me to guard when others cannot? I wish I knew. I wish for so much. My life is a wreck. I need air that will not blast in my face and laugh. This tortuous life.... The guarding has been easy lately. Surprisingly enough as it is. I’m glad for that at least. Maybe, just maybe, I can sleep for once tonight. This odd feeling that I can’t fall asleep... Why does it happen? I grow more and more less hungry. I haven’t eaten in a few days. In my head things rhyme for no reason, why is that? Words sound like music... I need sleep. Nay. I need to go for a flight. At least I can leave the wall whenever need be. This is a great thing by far. Now then. My ramblings are mixed together. I want so much and need much more. I do not know how much longer I can stand to stand still and wait for this death to come. As young as I may appear to be, I would prefer to die rather than suffer. Aha... Many would ask why I wish death would come. I can understand their questions. I wonder now if that teller really knew what this mark meant. No one else I have ever questioned about it has a clue. I truly wish to meet with that creature which made this mark on me. I have so many questions that bubble in my head. Here is where I leave... My dears. Good day.
~Daruka
January 18th
~Daruka
January 18th